#HR #RRHH Making love and making personal #branding #leadership

There are people who are very good at getting other people to do what they want, especially at work. So how do they do it?

You may be surprised to know that you probably already have the qualities you need to be persuasive. It doesn't mean you have to be manipulative or a suck-up. Genuine persuasiveness is an important part of being successful.

Here are 12 secrets of the most successfully persuasive people. Do you recognize any of these qualities within yourself? What areas do you need to cultivate?

Remember your kindergarten report card, when you were evaluated on things like your ability to follow directions, name the colors, and sing the alphabet? It also included an early assessment of a skill that would influence your success for the rest of your life: the ability to "play well with others." The criteria were pretty basic at the time: share, wait your turn, don't hit or yell, help when someone is struggling. As you grow up, many of the same basic principles apply, but situations can be much more complicated for adults to play well together and still achieve desired results.

Context and personal needs often create internal conflict when trying to weigh the needs of the few against the good of the whole. And as a leader, sometimes you have to make a conscious choice to make others unhappy. Still, with a little finesse, you can meet objectives and still all play in a happy sandbox. You may not satisfy everyone all of the time, but then working together to resolve conflicts, rather than just being pleasant all of the time, can make a team stronger.

Sometimes scientific research teaches us things we might not want to know. That happened when organizational psychologists studied West Point cadets to learn what personal qualities were most likely to predict success. The No. 1 answer? Narcissism.

Think Napoleon and Steve Jobs. Narcissists achieve amazing things, usually by putting their needs and desires ahead of everything and everyone else. They'll also go to great lengths to achieve their goals. Most important, they can be great at getting others on board as well.

1. Don't pretend you're not really in charge.

If the buck stops at your desk, acting like you're the same as everyone else won't work. It's a bit like parents who try to function as their children's friends, rather than as authority figures. It may be more fun in the short run, but will likely lead to bad results in the long run.

There are a very few exceptions--one is Morning Star, the tomato processor that has rigorously maintained a non-hierarchical structure since the 1970s. But that takes a lot of forethought, planning, and careful hiring of like-minded individuals. And even so, the company's non-CEO founder must occasionally serve as decider of last resort when employees are unable to resolve their conflicts.

What is mental toughness? Is mental toughness essential to high achievement? What do mentally tough people avoid?

For a number of years, Dr Angela Duckworth, a neurobiologist and psychologist has studied thousands of business people, graduates, lawyers, doctors, artists, writers, teachers and students in all kinds of challenging settings. She has wanted to understand ”Who is successful here and why?”